Dear Pinky Toe:

I'm so sorry that I almost amputated you off of my foot when I rammed, full-force, into the coffee table (which was reminiscent of a certain other full-force shin ramming incident from a few years back). It must have been just awful for you because of the little metal plate that covers the bottom of each coffee table leg.

I'm also sorry that now you have a strange bruise developing and what appeared to be an instant blood blister. This totally sucks and looks strange next to your Shrek-inspired nail polish.

You're throbbing and I can't do a thing about it.

Again, my apologies.


ps. You're starting to look gross so you may want to think about covering up. Just sayin'

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