BB Nightmare

If Ragan gets evicted next week, I'm gonna be sooooooo pissed. I'm not sure that it would stop me from watching the last few week's worth of episodes, but I seriously love him!

All right, I also like Lane, so I guess it wouldn't be the ultimate worst if Ragan got eliminated, but Lane's not nearly as awesome as Ragan.

Britney, though, can leave at any time. Her teeth are starting to freak me out a little bit because the more I look at them, the more they start to resemble Gary Busey's grill (which is, not good, obviously).

Oh, and Meow-Meow can also leave soon, as he's won absolutely nothing all season and isn't very entertaining...except for his current Penguin-suit condition, but that'll be over soon and he'll be back to being useless.

(man, I'm kind of crabby this morning, perhaps I need more caffeine)


Pineapple Furbies

Movies that are funny and have great dialogue are my most favourite of all of the movies.

In the last couple of days, I've (re)watched Pineapple Express and Madagascar 2 and both are hilarious. I find that most people had a severe reaction to PE; either they loved it or hated it (and in some cases, walked out within the first ten minutes...if you've seen it, you'd kind of get why, but whatevs).

Let me be frank here. If you didn't find Pineapple Express to have (at least) 2 of the funniest scenes ever, that still make you howl with laughter...then we probably wouldn't like each other. When Seth Rogen & James Franco are stuck in the forest, and then walk out of it the following morning, I literally (figuratively) die.

Dale Denton: How could he find us?

Saul: Umm, heat-seeking missiles, bloodhounds, foxes, barracudas.
Dale Denton: It's just... I'm kind flabbergasted when you say things like that. It's weird.
Saul: Thank you.
Dale Denton: Not a compliment.

(insert my death, by laughter)
Now, it's a tad bit violent and gross at times, but I've never seen another movie like it before and it's awesome.

So after that gem, which we watched on DVD last night, I woke up this morning to find that Madagascar 2 was playing on the TV. Holy crap, that movie is equally as hilarious! King Julien's character is amazing, the furbie being chased by the shark never ceases to make me laugh and the Penguins...well...

Kowalski: Only two passengers unaccounted for, Skipper.

Skipper: That's a number I can live with! Good landing, boys! Who says a penguin can't fly?

Oh man, funny movies are just the greatest.


Death by Dishes

I hate doing the dishes.

No, I loathe doing the dishes.

When I'm standing at the kitchen sink, rubber gloved and feeling warm from the steaming soapy water, I hate my life.

Well, that may be a slight over-exaggeration, but I often find myself doing a brief cost analysis on how much it would take for me to throw out all the dirty pans and pots and replace them with shiny new ones. Obviously, it never works out as a cost-effective solution, so I inevitably end up having to scrub and scour and wash...all the while cursing at myself for making nachos that (although delicious) left hard-as-cement melted cheese in the corners of a baking tray that simply REFUSES to disintegrate.

But, just now, my wonderful partner (with the great ass) swooped in, kissed me on the cheek, and sent me into the living room to drink my tea as he gallantly put on his own (slightly larger, and white) rubber gloves to take over.

So now I'm sitting here, typing this post, drinking my lovely morning caffeine fix, and listening to a little Method Man, clanging silverware and occasional outbursts of rhymes from my lover-for-life.

What a nice morning.

Beautiful Day For a Float

I was out with the boys this morning, on our walk and I could almost feel the weather change around me. There was some random dude out, washing his car and one other dog-walker, but aside from that, I was alone with my thoughts. Only a month ago, I'd have to get up with Marc at 6:30am so that I could get out before it got too hot out. Now, I wait until 7:30 and have to wear long sleeves and pants. My body felt warm underneath my pink-on-pink running jacket, but the wind nipped at my face and hands and I never reached the point where I had to take it off. Summer's on her way out, which means that we'll soon be in my favourite season, fashion wise, but I'm sad to see her go.

However, it's shaping up to be a beautiful and hot day out today so we're going tubing on the Nashwaaksis. It's been rainy this week and the water's finally up enough so that we can throw our butts in a black rubber donut and let the current carry us, and the afternoon, away. It's just the two of us today, which is a first, but I don't imagine that we'll be alone, as the clear, blue sky probably means that we'll run into others. If you haven't experience Nature's version of a lazy river, I highly recommend it as the activity has quickly skyrocketed to the top of the "Best parts of NB" list.

And the total cost is under $10.

Long live the Maritimes!

UPDATE: The water was freezing but the sun was warm!


The Final Chen Post?

Well Julie, you've been 3 for 3 the last eviction shows and last night, you looked the best you've ever looked.


The black suit was bangin'. Like, literally (metaphorically).

And the shoes gurl! FIERCE!

I will retire The Chen Diaries as I no longer have any beef with the beautifully put together Ms. Julie Chen.

(unless she becomes a hot mess again....you've been warned missus).

Truck-stache = Love

We were just driving home and saw that some neighbors of ours were having a pool party. There were a pretty good collection of cars and trucks lining the driveway and as we turned the corner, we saw the greatest thing ever.

A blue pickup truck with a pink mustache that was the entire length of the front fender.

Simply amazing.

(My stupid camera ran out of battery, so I have no picture to remember the greatest truck of life...so this post will have to suffice...boo)

Dear Axe:

Just when I thought that your marketing campaigns couldn't get more obnoxious, you surprised me and managed to outdo yourself in your newest commercial. The product, itself, is a fairly cool idea as it's some body spray that somehow changes into different scents as it evaporates...


Your rushed tag line in the end of the ad that says, "Women get bored easily," sort of makes my blood boil. All the grassroots, old school feminism aside, what the hell kind of line is that? I doubt that I'm the only one who's had a bone of contention with the phrase, which leads me to ask, who does your research? They should be fired on the spot, and here's why.

Hey, Axe Deodorant: Guess who buys all of the toiletries in my house?

Come on, guess!

It's ME (and I believe it's the norm in a lot of hetero-households).

Here's another question Axe, and I know that you're going to get this one super fast (or I should hope because if you don't, you're ill-informed as well as idiotic):

Guess who's never going to buy your product?

Vetos and Nominations and Double Evictions, Oh My!

After a minor 5-alarm crisis, (when we turned the TV on and some stupid football game was playing...luckily, Global Canada doesn't care about the Patriots) Big Brother was insane. If you haven't watched it yet, but want to, stop reading now.

What a jam packed show full of vetos, POH and then live voting...*sigh* I love BB.

We thought - for sure - that Ragan was going home and we were so bummed out because he was our pick to win it. BUT, then he pulled it out and BAM - won the veto and got off of the block!

Matt and Brendon ended up getting evicted and I couldn't be more delighted. For a moment, I had been rooting for Brendon because he was so hated in the house, but then he kept saying stupid things and I was, again, over him.

I'm sad that there's only 5 people left though because it means that summer's almost over! Boo!! BOO!!!

That also means that McDonald's $1 drinks are also coming to a end...

I'm not sure which one is worse.

(I'm now sitting down to watch the Jersey Shore, and it's supposed to be epic so look for that post later today).


BB Mania

Double Eviction
Double Eviction
Double Eviction
Double Eviction
Double Eviction
Double Eviction
Double Eviction
Double Eviction
Double Eviction

Who's going?


I can't wait to find out!

Worst Summer Job. Ever.

Every day, I head downtown to use the Shaky-shaky machine that astronauts use in space, to do my 10 minutes workout. Finding parking on the street can be a nightmare sometimes, so occasionally I have to park behind Officer's Square and then walk across it. I usually cruise down around 11:30, and that's when I learned of the worst student summer job, evah.

Each weekday, at 11am, about 30 students get dressed up in old-school military uniforms, consisting of large black hats, red buttoned jackets and guns. They march around, in formation, regardless of the humid/super hot weather for whoever is standing on this wooden block, surrounded by flags. The pomp and circumstance happens for the better part of 45 minutes, but every once and a while, there's also the addition of bagpipes and a small parade. Looking at the glistening (re, sweaty) faces of the poor guys (and few gals) who aren't getting much money for having to walk around looking silly and melting in the summer heat.

Could you imagine running into an "ex" while dressed like a circa 1800's soldier, marching down Queen St.? What a nightmare.

However, I've been told that they pretty much only work 4 hours a day, practicing and then the 11 & 4pm performances, so I guess that doesn't make it too, too bad.

Nope, who am I kidding? That job sucks.



Well, Eye'll Be Damned

We finally got our benefit card in the mail, so this week's full of dentists and eye doctors. I missed the magical card that saves me 80% on meds and gives me free glasses and clean teeth. So, this morning, I had a visit with the eye doc and he scared the bejebus out of me when he said that Prednisone causes cataracts. I have enough senior-crap to deal with and avoiding cataracts would be nice.

Well steroids, I finally managed to dodge one of your side effects, as it turns out that my eyesight has gotten BETTER!

I was able read the smallest line on the chart thingy and, consequently, blew the doc's mind with my fast reading of E V B L C (and my eye's apparent ability to self-heal). He said that it's not the most uncommon thing (having your prescription decrease) but I'm taking it as good news.

Just another thing that makes me a medical marvel, I guess. But the best part of all is that it was FREE!!!!


Dear Dude Waiting to Cross the Street Downtown:

I was surprised with your look, considering it's supposed to be over 25 degrees with the humidity today, but impressed that you fully committed.

It takes a special kind of guy to sport huge black leather bike boots with buckles and grommets, paired with black jeans, a black dress-shirt and then one of those skinny ties with a cow head at the top. I was sitting in my car, thinking about how hot you were going to be later (especially as you were hoofing it and not in an air-conditioned bubble).

Then, you completely blew my mind as you started to walk.

Your hand swung out ahead, as you made your way across the intersection and I could see that you were holding... a briefcase?
Like, an old-school, rectangled-leather, lock built in on the top, kind of briefcase. You couldn't have been more of a walking contradiction.

Were you going to a meeting?! What do you do? How aren't you a sweaty mess?! Why are you walking?! There are so many questions!!

So yeah, dude, if you have a chance and we meet again, I totally want to get to know your deal (unless of course, you turn out to be a total creep-0, which has about a 40 - 70% chance of happening...I'm willing to take the risk).


Par-don me?

A few of us went golfing yesterday and...

on the last hole (16th for us, but it was twilight)...

I hit a fantastic shot off of the tee...



Woot Woot!!

It. was. awesome.

There were 3 of us and we were paired up with a Dad and his daughter who he let play with us after the tee-shot (insert unimpressed face here). So, it took forever for us to actually get through the front 9, but after we dumped the dead weight, we sped through and almost finished.
The game was, essentially, brought to us by nature, which was also pretty awesome. We saw groundhogs, (and I was secretly waiting for Bill Murray to appear from behind a tree or something) a family of deer and two red-headed wood peckers.
It was a seriously great afternoon! YAY SUMMER!


Well, Ms. Chen,

You looked fantastic on Thursday! FANTASTIC!

The pantsuit was amazing, the necklace was awesome and your head looked great!

What happened? How did you finally figure out how to not look like a potato sack? Or a grocery bag? It doesn't really matter but KEEP IT UP!!!

Seriously though, that necklace was super great.

I tip my fedora to you, Julie.


Griffen Fever

Forget The Beibs, I've got Griffin Fever!!

I watched Kathy on Larry this morning, where they talked about same-sex marriage. She was surprisingly eloquent and made some great points, but that's not what I wanted to share.

Before Kathy's interview, Dr. Laura Schlessinger was on and she announced her retirement from talk radio. I've read The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage and listened to her show for a while on Sirius, but eventually tired of her extra-brutal nature and perspective on certain social issues. She made some really great points that I would have never thought of (ever) but then she'd say something fairly offensive (Apparantly, she's facing some serious criticism for using the N-Bomb a million times in one call and the backlash has prompted her "retirement").

So, Larry asks Kathy what she thinks about Dr. Laura's retirement after so long and Kathy responds with:

Well, I don't really know what kind of doctor she is, like, is she a botanist? I'm not going to call her doctor, so, what do I think of Laurie's retirement...?

I totally love Ms. Griffin.

Farrah!! FARRAH!!!

How did you not see that coming?!?


For those of you who do not keep up with the Teen Mom drama, let me fill you in. Farrah wanted to sell her car, so she posted it for sale on Craigslist. Within a day, she had someone from out of state who was willing to pay her full price, plus $3,000 to ship the car to him but he'd need her to send him the money beforehand.

So I watched (alongside the film-crew!!!), helpless, as she deposited an "$8,000" cheque into a bank machine, withdrew $3,000, walked over to Western Union and then sent this douche $3,000.

She finds out that she's seriously overdrawn 2 days later.

Now, anybody over the age of 25 (fingers crossed anyway) would know that this was CLEARLY a scam, but since dear Farrah is only 17, she fell for it and got totally screwed. Although the rest of the Mom's seem to be getting better (well...at least getting by), Farrah's doing a lot of unnecessary learning.

But seriously, how could the camera crew and producers NOT step in there? It's clearly not a serious documentary and I'm sure that they wouldn't just sit back and watch her baby get hit by a car or something, right? I'm not saying that they should always intervene but obviously Farrah needs a little bit of extra help.

So brutal...and the trailer doesn't seem like it gets any better next week. I'm almost ready for this season to wrap up, but at least Catelynn and Tyler have gotten through their rough patch!

(God, I may be a little old to be so emotionally attached, but I can't help it...I naturally root for the underdog and this show's chalk full of them)


Dear Ottawa Tourism Commission:

Nice try.

I just saw your newest commercial and, let me say, it's going to take more than that to get me back. The addition of a "light show" on our parliamentary buildings seems like a huge waste of money and, clearly, other countries are going to be laughing at us because our primary decision-making building now looks like a Christmas tree...or an all-night diner.

Also, you missed the best parts, which are the Beavertails, skating on the river (not the same as taking a shitty-looking boat tour on the river) and the wine show. OH - and being able to just zip across the river to purchase large beers for $5 at gas stations in Quebec.

I give you a C for trying...but an overall F.

"Just go?"

No thanks.

(but you're welcome to try again)


Syndication Slip-up?

Because Rogers is the best company ever, we've been lucky to recieve six months of free service that includes all the wonderful random channels that you've probably never heard of (I hadn't, anyway). One of these undiscovered gems is Out TV (which is fairly self-explanatory). They have some great shows, Two Queens and a Castle, Gay Cops...and...

Breaker High?

You can see my confusion.

Was this a mix-up or were BH reruns just super cheap? Don't get me wrong, I can understand the Ryan Gosling point, but he was very skinny and kind of annoying in his sitcom days. So yeah. I think there was some kind of mistake there (but, obviously, that won't stop me from watching it).

Creepy Mad Men

The 4th season of Mad Men started about a month ago and it's started by hitting the ground running, which is just how I like it. I find that I don't particularly like any characters in the show (well, maybe Peggy) because, frankly, none of them seem to be good people. However, that's what makes the show so captivating!

Marc and I were watching the 3rd episode and a creepy little-kid character from the 3rd season made an appearance. His name is Glen and he is the scariest/creepiest little boy EVER!

He is two and a half steps away from becoming a psycho stalker and makes me uncomfortable. He doesn't seem to have facial expressions and (I think he's supposed to be 12 or so) he seems to know an awful lot about his mother's sex life...plus, he's kind of obsessed with the Draper girls.

His bug eyes have haunted my mind ever since and I'm hoping that his family moves away or something because I feel like he's just getting the creep-fest started.

For instance, he broke into their house and egged everyone's beds except the daughter's and only an off-balanced little kid would do something like that. I predict that this situation is only going to get worse...but hopefully will be over soon without anything awful happening.

But this is a show about awful things that less-than-wonderful people do, so I should just stop expecting some type of happy ending, but I can't help it.

I'm an optimist.


Dear Diddy:

We're fighting (but I will forgive you, only if, you get rid of the dash).

I'll be awaiting your press-release (regarding your new-new-new(-new?) name change) with bated breath.

I know you'll do the right thing.

Filthy Cash


Someone just mentioned to me that P. Diddy had changed his name - yet again - to...

Diddy Dirty Money.

Now, that guy likes to change up his name every few years and it's actually a kind of cool idea. However, I need to give you some perspective of where I'm looking at "Diddy Dirty Money" from.

Marc and I have Sirius radios and love listening to all the commercial-free music that we can. I'm partial to "Lithium" and "90's on 9," while Marc prefers the Hip-Hop stations (note that I do not know their names). Anyway - over the course of our tri-provincial-road-trip, we noticed something funny about Hip-Hop/Rap artists.

A lot of them have names with "money" somehow involved.

Cash Money, Kas Money, Young Money...you get my drift.

It didn't take too long for Marc and I to add "money" to the list of words that we tie onto the end of a name (Pickle-pants, Pepi-face, baby-muffin), so we just about died when we heard about Diddy Dirty Money.

But that joy was short lived as I decided that I would fact-check the revelation on Google, and it turns out, it's actually the name of his new group, so it actually looks like: Diddy - Dirty Money.


And now I'm kind of mad at him, actually.

Oh, The Humanity (Citizens Of, that is)

Who's got 2 thumbs and is wearing her super-skinny jeans?

This gal!!

There's nothing better - ever - than pulling on your haven't-fit-into-in-a-thousand-years jeans and then being able to button them!

And then sit down!

Without them digging into your tummy or threatening to split open in the back!

And then the uber-mega-bonus was that there was a $5 dollar bill in the back pocket!


Timmies for everyone!


Answer Me This:

How did Nicolas Cage get into acting?

Usually (I'd assume, anyway) it'd be the striking young lad with a natural charm, who would impress a casting director, which would then jumpstart a successful acting career (if the looks were backed up with talent). This is how I view the acting world, anyway, hence, my confusion regarding Mr. Cage.

When I think of him, the first image that comes to mind is Ghost Rider, where he was a little bit cute, actually, (but that probably had more to do with his jacked body and not his face), I know that isn't an accurate representation of his image. Some older actors simply lived "too hard" to age gracefully (Charlie Sheen) while others managed to get even better looking as time moves on (Mark Wahlburg and the ever-classic Mr. Clooney). Good ole Nick doesn't fit into either of these categories.

After watching my SVU, I scanned for something to watch while cleaning up my living room and stumbled upon the DIVA network, where a movie called "Valley Girl" was just starting. The info said that it was made in 1983 and hinted at similarities to "Can't Buy Me Love" (Oh - vintage McDreamy....) so, obviously, I started watching it.

So my question has become: who the hell cast Nicolas CAge as the "good-looking rebel" who the "valley girl" falls for?

He must have been sleeping with someone because that's the only way he could have gotten this gig.

Bad acting.
Bad teeth.
Bad face.

Just look at the picture above. There isn't much else to say.

Not cute to begin with (not even ALMOST cute, really) and not cute later on.

(but obviously I'm going to watch the rest of it while I wash some dishes)

*UPDATE*: Mr. Cage just won the award for "most awkward makeout scene" although I'm fairly certain that it was supposed to look "hot." It was tepid. At best. I think there may have been some tooth-to-tooth action. The actress playing opposite him didn't look too into it.

*2nd UPDATE*: I've just been informed (by a Fedora-wearing little bird) that Nic is Francis Ford Coppola's nephew.

Well, shut the front door; the world makes sense again.

She did it (kind of)!


Have you been reading my blog, girl?

Well, it certainly seems that way because, last night, you looked great! Nice teal shirt/sleeveless cardigan and simple white pants. I knew you could do it! Was it the suggestion of taking polaroids?

Hair - pretty good.

Make-up - still a little bit overdone, but all right.

Shoes - couldn't really see them, but that could have been because I was distracted by not being distracted by the lack of hideousness.

Also - the episode was great! Bye Bye whiner!!

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you, Julie.

Keep saying "no" to long olive dresses with cargo pockets and a cowled neckline!


Law & Order: SVU + Mush-mush = Notsogood

Our PVR is set up to automatically record new episodes of whatever show is programmed. This morning, I woke up to a new SVU (my fav of all of the Law and Orders because they often get the super-bad guy and I appreciate the revenge violence) and was excited because it'd been a while since I'd seen an episode.

Everything was going along and it looked like it was going to be a good episode.


Mischa Barton appeared...as a prostitute?

Needless to say, I was more than a little surprised and it jumped me out of the show and into the critical part of my brain - as she was the most unconvincing prostitute I'd ever seen.

Who made that casting choice?

It was bad.
Really bad.
Really, really.

I'm pretty sure that her career isn't what she'd imagined it would be - frankly - she never should have left the OC (not that I watched it, but lots of other people seemed to) and maybe it's time she considered retirement.

SVU is a great show that covers some pretty horrific (yet very realistic) situations and the whole point of sitting through all of the ugliness is to have the happy ending and Ms. Barton RUINED that for me (because she was. without a doubt. the worst "acting" prostitute I'd ever seen).

Here's hoping that there won't be a Mush-mush sequel.


Dear Shriners:

You are some sneaky sneakies...

I picked up my phone tonight, which had a local number, and was greeted with: "Hello, My name is Brian and I am calling from the Shriners, the guys in the funny hats who help needy children who live in Fredericton..."

What can you say to an opening line like that?

I'll tell you, what you say. It goes a little something like, "I'll go get my VISA"

We look forward to the upcoming charity circus show on November 10th and applaud your sales techniques.

They're rather flawless.

Ding, Dong, The Spider's Dead!

Which spider, you say?

The huge one that attempted to catch Pepi in its web earlier today.

Marc went on arachnid patrol when he came home from work and found the little sucker off the side of the deck, on the side of our house. One flyswatter-attack later...well...let's just say that it will no longer be bothering us (moreso, me).

Now we can resume sitting outside without worrying about an impending attack.

My hubby...my hero.

When Nature Attacks.

Oh Em Gee, I was almost eaten by a spider.

For reals.

It was hiding in the umbrella that I wanted to put up over the table because I needed some shade and I'm going to have to find a therapist to deal with my PTSD.

Before we left a couple of weeks ago, we unhooked the umbrella so it wouldn't fly away when we were gone (it's the shape of a rectangle and thusly, is a large wind catcher even when closed) and just leaned it up against the corner of the deck. When I went to put it in the holder, it didn't even occur to me that Aragog's 2nd cousin (re: the large spider from Harry Potter, high-five if you got that one!) could be waiting to eat my face.

Obviously, when I saw him (how could I miss him, he was bigger than Pickle) I screeched and ran back inside the house. That would have been the end of this story, but all of my stuff was still on the table (laptop, manuscript, phone, and other important things) so I knew that I had to go back outside to get it all (Marc won't be home for hours, otherwise this would have been diverted to a Blue Job).

Crouching on the ground, under the table (just in case he decided to fall on me - basically my worst nightmare) I started the felt-way-longer-than-three-minute collection of my things. One frantic hand-grab after another...after scoping out the fox-sized-spider's-location, of course, I'd managed to collect everything and make it back inside, physically unscathed (but emotionally scarred for life).

Living in a forest is awesome sometimes, but right now. It sucks.

I am so having nightmares about that guy tonight. Ew. *shudder, shudder*


Dear Doyon Naturel Miel Pur:

Vous êtes délicieux.


Incroyablement. Délicieux.

It's actually not fair to other honey.

You're almost too sweet to handle, but keep to the line close enough not to be excessive. The spreadable aspect takes it to another level because you can layer it on without having it leaving little droplets on your shirt. Or skirt. Or pants. (you see where I'm going with this, I drop honey on basically everything)

We cracked open the first jar last night and already, it's a third gone. I feel like I need to hide the other one from Marc or we'll be through both jars by the end of the week (Yes, I am aware that it is Wednesday, but Marc's a honey-fiend and when I say the "end of the week," I'm actually referring to Friday, not Sunday).

Bravo, Doyon.


Catelynn and Maci and Farrah, Oh My!

Oh Teen Moms! It's not getting any better, is it?

Farrah seemed like a total flake in the first season but my heart is breaking for her in the second. She really seems like she's getting her shit together, but there was a lot that the cameras didn't show before and it turns out that she's had a pretty rough go of it.

Catelynn & Tyler look like they're going to be on the outs soon and that also sucks. Couples counseling at age 17 is probably a foreshadowing event.

Fighting while proposing is probably a sign that you shouldn't get married (pssst, Gary, that little pearl of wisdom is for you) and I'm pretty sure that I'll never be taking a baby on a Florida-bound road-trip. Ever. (so thanks for that, I guess)

So bad! It's just SO BAD! But I CAN'T STOP WATCHING!

The preview for next week doesn't look like it gets any better (not that it matters because I've (embarassadly) become very emotionally attached to these girls and will be holding out for a happy ending, even if it's an unrealistic expectation).

Wrap it up, boys!

Wrap. It. Up.


Oh Enbridge, you're so sneaky...

Got a gas bill in the mail yesterday, but I didn't open it until this morning. My heart stopped as I saw a $600 amount in the bottom right corner. My inner monologue went a little something like:

"WHAAA? I've paid this bill! I know that I pay this bill every month!! It's always the same!! I PAY. I PAID!!!"

I could feel myself start to sweat and I looked at the clock to see that it was way too early to call Enbridge. I then took a closer look at the bill to see if I could figure out what the hell happened.

Then I felt my heart soar.

Next to the $600 some-odd bill were two glorious letters.

They were: CR

Yes, if you're a swift one (cudos, as it took me a little longer to figure out), you've realized that the bill wasn't a bill, but a paper demonstration of my overpayment on standardized bills.

So, wouldn't it be nice if all companies overestimated your usage for a year and then reimbursed you with a massive credit at the end that ends up meaning you get free service for at least the next three point five months?


Dear IKEA:

I didn't realize how much I loved you until you were so far away. There are some things that you have, which cannot be found anywhere else.

In particular, your seriously giant drinking glasses. (for those who know me well, I use the word "giant" sparingly, so rest assured that these glasses really are enormous) We originally purchased a set of six a few years ago and recently have broken all but two.

Well the days of fighting over the giant glasses is over because we stopped in a store in Vaughn and purchased TWO more sets for a total of 14!!

Life is good.

The Real World: Tremblant

A couple of wonderful people in my life got married this weekend, on a wonderful estate just outside of Mont Tremblant. We were in Ontario anyway, so on Friday we packed up the car one final time and headed out to la belle provence. The drive was fairly painless and only included one unexpected GPS treat (a trip across a river on a ferry).

When we arrived at our rented condo, we basically lost our minds. It was the most pimpin' place ever! Killer views of the mountains, a huge living room/dining room/kitchen/deck and five bedrooms! Oh yeah, and since there were seven of us, plus one jacuzzi tub in the master bedroom, we obviously became The Real World: Tremblant.

After an impromptu Friday night party with some of the wedding attendees, we were seriously ready to git 'er done for the wedding.

Which was.

The Best.



A complete lovefest from start to finish and one of those rare weddings where it was almost impossible not to meet and then fall in love with "the other side." The groom's family and friends blended almost seamlessly with the bride's and that all added up to the fastest 8 hour reception ever. Laughing and celebrating with people who you've known for years and others who you've just met is one of life's perfect bonuses and I will always smile when thinking about the 39-hour Foreign-French-(although somehow a southern accent seemed more appropriate)-wedding-road-trip-adventure.

I currently sound like a raspy-chain-smoking-bingo-playing-senior, but will be back to normal by the end of the week. Frankly, even if it took twice as long and I was forced to take a truckload of meds that would re-swell my face... it would still be worth it.

That's just how great it was.


Murderous Chalet

I've been staying up at my family's chalet (or, Shawlet, since I'm the only one here at the moment) for the last few days while Marc's been in Newmarket working on a thermography job. Now, this place is where I spent my first Christmas and almost every winter weekend until I left for university. One could assume that since I've spent such a large part of my time here, I'd know my way around.
However, there has been a extreme chalet makeover and things are not where they once were.

In total, the newly-designed chalet has tried to kill me twice and really seemed to be invested in getting me as bruised as possible for a friend's upcoming wedding on Saturday.

Both attempts on my life happened at night when I was making my way to the ladies' room (as I'm the only one here). The first night, I was staying in the bedroom upstairs because it has a ceiling fan and it was h-o-t. I don't know if they are especially poking out doorknobs, but one rammed into the side of my hip, which turned me around and I ran smack into the wall, almost chipping my tooth.
Last night, I slept downstairs, and there was a treacherous rubber boot that was sticking out really far out from the shoe rack. Obviously, my huge big toe caught the side of one of the boots and I went flying into the side of the staircase.
So, between the midnight assassination attempts and the higher-than-average bed frames (whose corners have left a smattering of bruises on my thighs) it appears like I have participated in some type of elite forces training camp (or a crossfit class, haha!).

In a few hours, I'll be off to join Marc in Newmarket tonight and then we leave for Tremblant in the morning.

Hopefully my in-law's house isn't in on the hit.