Down Under Dirty Thirty

A wonderful pal who's currently living in a land down under is having a big birthday today!!


What up, dirty thirty?

So in honour of my Rapunzl-haired friend, I have composed the following poem:

Something Bad Has Happened

*clears throat*

It was over 12 weeks ago when I marched right in
To my local post office, to do me some inquirin.'
I asked the very knowledgable clerk how long it would take
to send something to Australia so my present wouldn't be late.

It would take four to 12 weeks for something big
and three to six weeks for something small like a fig.
I looked at her quizzicly and said, "That's a really big gap!"
 "A bin sits till it's full, then goes," came out of her yap.

So my quest for a small gift began then and there,
perhaps there was something I could buy for her hair?
Around and around my little city, I went
until I found her the most perfect present.

Delighted and proud that I'd left enough time
for it to arrive down under, frankly I felt sublime.
"I need to mail this in a month" I said to myself
and put the gift down on a nearby shelf.

Well Christmas came and went, but the present stayed
exactly where I left it, until the mailing day came.
I went to the shelf to collect the gift
but it wasn't there; man I was miffed.

I searched and searched, but it was nowhere to be found.
Where the heck did it go? It has to be around!
Up the stairs and down, from the bedroom to my car
As the title of this poem tells you, I didn't get very far.

Convinced I would find it when I wasn't really looking
I went about my business, doing my usual baking and cooking.
But not a day would go by without me rifling around
in drawers, cabinets and closets -- oh please just be found!

So now it's my Aussie pals' big dirty thirty
and the only present she got from me is this one, it's wordy.
Since she's a day ahead, this is actually a day late
but that's kind of fitting, considering her present's fate.

I love and miss my fellow loud-talker,
when she comes back to Canada, I'm becoming her stalker.
Someday I hope to find the missing inventory
but in the mean time, it's kind of a funny story.

Happy Birthday Aussie!


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